a dearth of signs ([info]prosphoros) wrote,
@ 2009-07-13 21:34:00
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Current mood: confused

anger, again
It feels like a lot of things are making me angry lately, but in a weird way I'm not sure I can explain, it feels like the anger comes from a place of strength. Even if I can (maybe) make sense of that, I still don't know what to do with it, since it seems like so much of "getting along" is letting things slide, letting things go unremarked, not pointing out that maybe the emperor isn't wearing shoes, not taking unpopular positions. I don't understand, if it actually is strength behind this anger, how I can possibly do anything with it without being markedly less fun at parties and increasingly isolated. There's got to be a way, but I just can't see it. I want to get there, but all I see is here, and the two don't appear to connect.


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[info]fairyhead
2009-07-14 01:37 pm UTC (link)
So, this makes me think about the conversations I have with Anne about my anger. The follow on, of course, is that I want people to change to my liking. Much as I still love that idea, I'm coming to terms with the fact that it's not going to generally happen and that's not going to be where I find satisfaction.

Now, seeing beyond that into how to actually implement it, particularly without feeling like I'm returning to some kind of doormat or high maintenance bitch binary, I have no clue. I know that there's something valuable there about setting boundaries and sticking to them, but it's still cloudy as to how that works for me.

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